Fish Humor
Two fish are swimming upstream. One bumps into a concrete wall. He raises a fin to his forehead and says, "Dam!"
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About Me
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- Rick Bylina
- Apex, NC, United States
- Friends encouraged me to create a web presence, so I have. Join me for Monday Morning Wake-up Calls (MMWUC), novel excerpts, book reviews, and whatever tumbles out of my head and onto the blog. Literary greatness inspires me, but mysteries rule my novels. Validation of my writing journey through publication is what I seek. Agents seeking a new voice, apply here.
Labels
- Awards (1)
- Books (30)
- c (1)
- count (54)
- DA GUIDELINEZ (9)
- Discussion (23)
- MMWUC (46)
- Muse Search (17)
- On Writing (80)
- Other (45)
- Poetry (3)
- Sales and Publishing (8)
- Short Stories (12)
- Steal this idea (43)
- The Beneficiary (2)
- WIP - IOSM (4)
My Completed Novels
- A MATTER OF FAITH. 90,000 word mystery. Detective Roger Stark's ability to solve two seemingly unrelated murders depends on sheltered Faith Moreno's pursuit of newly-returned Father Pat. It also marks her as the killer's next target.
- ONE PROMISE TOO MANY. 87,000 word mystery. When assigned to find a kidnapped five-year-old girl, Marshfield's newest detective, Roger Stark, learns that promises should be apportioned, fears kept in check, and there are limits to negotiations.
- SECRETS. 98,000 word mystery. Based on real events, two conspiracies collide in Big Woods, North Carolina. One prevents solving a 16-year-old cold case of a murdered cop. The other threatens Bruce Neumanski's life.
Awards, Contests, and Free Retreats
- Awards - American Booksellers Assn
- Deadline-various - About.com (monthly)
- Deadline-various - Cup of Comfort
- Deadline-various - MSU Library Listings
- Deadline-various - Poets & Writers
- Deadline-various - Wordpress *12/06
- Deadline-various - Writer's Digest
- Deadline-various - Writers' Journal
- Deadline 09/07-01/08 - PEN Awards
- Deadline 02/15/08 - Mystery Short Story *01/07
- Deadline 02/17/08 - The Sandy *12/06
- Deadline 03/31/08 - Murder in the Grove
- Deadline 03/31/08 - St. Martin's Press
- Deadline 04/15/xx - Bulwer-Lytton
- Deadline 07/01/08 (start) - Zoetrope
- Deadline 08/31/08 - Fabri Literary
- Deadline 11/??/08 - Muse (short story)
- Free retreat (Wild Acres)
- Free retreat (The Hall Farm)
- Mystery Awards, Events, & much more
- Mystery Awards 2
- Mystery Awards 3
- Prize - National Book Award
- Prize - Nobel for Literature
- Prize - Pulitzer for Fiction
- Shaw (conferences/events/workshps)
Critique Help
Friends and E-Strangers
- Ann Hite
- Beth's Adventures (blog)
- Cindy Papken (NewtoWebsites) *09/11
- The Crimes of Austin Carr (blog)
- Daniel Burns "Call of the Unicorn" (blog) *09/20
- Dawn Goldsmith (blog)
- Deidre Kerce "Fall of the Sparrow" *09/20
- Eat 4 Today (blog) *09/20
- Erica Berkeley - The Written Word
- Gary Presley
- Jeannette Cezanne
- Lorin Oberweger
- Mab Morris *10/12
- Paul Lamb - Lucky Rabbit's Foot *06/13
- Rachel "Rae" Lindley
- Robin Helweg-Larsen - poet (blog)
- Ruth Douillette (blog)
- Sammi Souter
- Tales from the Far Manor (blog) *01/25
Genre Organizations
- Cat Writer's Association (meow)
- Dog Writer's of America (wuff)
- Historical (not hysterical) Novel Society
- Horror Writers Association
- Humor Writers' Org. (aka Erma Bombeck)
- International Thriller Writers
- Literary (The Association of Writers)
- Mystery Writers of America
- Romance Writers of America
- SF & Fantasy Writers of America
- Society of Children's Writers
- Western Writers of America
Mystery & Crime Stuff
- Crime and Suspense Online Ezine
- Crime Information from a 20 year pro (blog) *02/10
- Crime Scene Writer (fave)
- Crimespace (Mystery Writer's Network)
- DorothyL (mystery writers group)
- Inkspot - mystery writers' group (blog)
- Looking for a mystery?
- Murder She Writes (blog) *12/04
- Mystery Subgenre List
- Need to Know about a Weapon?
- Poe's Deadly Daughters (blog)
- Review Site: Reviewed by Liz *02/10
- Stop Your Killing Me Book List *12/04
- Vidocq Society
- Writing Rules (mysteries)
Novelists
- Becky Anderson - "In Stereo Where Available" (blog) *12/12
- Becky Motew - "Coupon Girl" (blog)
- Bob Sanchez - "When Pigs Fly"
- Christine Goff - Birdwatcher's mysteries
- J. A. Konrath - master of self-promotion
- Jack Getze - "Big Numbers"
- Janet Chapman - Highlander series
- Jennifer Cruisie - "The Unfortunate Miss Fortunes"
- Judge Susan P. Baker - "Death of a Prince"
- Kimberly Frost - "Would-be Witch" (coming 03/2009) (blog)
- L. L. Bartlett - "Murder on the Mind" (blog) *10/02
- Larry Buttram - Self-published POD novels.
- Laurel Lamperd - "Substitute Bride"
- Lazette - One million words per year
- Nancy Pickard - "The Virgin of the Plains" (Sweet Mystery of Life blog)
- Natalie R. Collins - "Behind Closed Doors"
- Richard Lewis - "The Killing Sea"
- Roger Cain - "Worth Killing"
- Roman White - "Roman does what?"
- Sanchona - "A Family of Strangers"
- Susan Goodwill - Kate London series
Publishing & Promotion
- AAR
- Agent Query
- Authors Around the South *12/17
- Backspace - the writer's place
- Bookcrossing - setting books free *02/05
- Booktour Site *02/12
- Book Connector *02/12
- Confessions of an Idiosyncratic Mind (blog)
- List your books for free sites *01/24
- Miss Snark Archives
- Preditors & Editors (fave)
- POD (Print on Demand) Publisher List
- PUB RANTS (great links) (blog)
- Publishers Marketplace
- Publishing and Promotions Group
- Red Room (Writer's blog) *01/08
- The Rejecter (blog)
- Virtual Book Tour - August 21, 2007
- 20 Worst Agents
Short Fiction Links
Writing Help
- Book Doctor - Elizabeth Lyon
- Editorial Services - Free Expressions
- Editorial Services - Words into Print
- Evil Overlord List
- 42K BBC War Stories *09/20
- Fixing things up (wordsmithing) (blog) *09/28
- Guide to Grammar
- Internet Writing Workshop (blog) *10/19
- Lipstick Chronicles (blog) *09/02
- NANOWRIMO
- National Writer's Union
- Number One Songs on a Specific Date *02/08
- Oral Traditions Database *10/03
- Product Naming Blog
- Publication Coach *12/04
- Random Name Generator
- Ten common fixable mistakes
- Time and Date Calculator
- Title Checker - LULU
- Ultimate Reference Desk, The
- World's Largest Online Book Club
- Word Count (flash fiction to epics)
- WD 101 Best Websites 2007 *09/14
- Writers Retreat Workshop (fave)
- Writing Discussion Podcasts *09/20
- Writing Prompts *01/21
- Writing Rules (Farmer's Almanac)
- Writing Rules (for mysteries from 1928)
- Writing Rules (Humorous - Grammar)
- Writing Rules (Leonard Elmore)
- Writing Rules (Seth's Advice)
- Writing Rules (Turkey City Lexicon) *11/03
- Writing Rules (ultimate list)
My Writing Resources
- "Between the Lines" by Jessica Page Morrell
- "bird by bird" by Anne Lamott
- "Chicago Manual of Style" (online)
- "Eats, Shoots & Leaves" by Lynne Truss
- "The Elements of Style" by Strunk and White
- "Goal, Motivation & Conflict" by Debra Dixon
- "The Marshall Plan for Novel Writing" by Evan Marshall (fave for beginners)
- "Merrian-Webster Dictionary and Thesaurus" (online)
- "On Writing" by Stephen King
- "Scene and Structure" by Jack Bickham
- "Story" by Robert McKee
- "Writing the Breakout Novel" by Donald Maass
DA GUIDELINEZ FOR THE WRITERS" JOURNEY
- 1. Tighten, tighten, tighten.
- 2. Use the five senses, plus two.
- 3. Unclear grammar confuses readers.
- 4. Reveal something in each sentence.
- 5. Don't lose the reader.
- 6. Avoid unnecessary dialogue tags.
- 7. Check your word choices.
- 8. Feel and felt filter emotion.
- 9. Scrutinize every use of use.
- 10. (coming soon)
Other Weird Things
Word Count in WIP
- 2007 NANOWRIMO = 10,399
- AugNoWriMo - 15,512 (must do better)
Blog Archive
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2008
(163)
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June
(20)
- Road Trip
- Scoring New Jersey
- MMWUC for June 23, 2008
- MMWUC for June 16, 2008
- Blank Sunday
- Are we there yet?
- 13 Black Cats are under the Ladder
- Mulch Madness
- I Don't Like Spiders and Snakes
- Rollcoaster Writing
- Dolores and the Blond
- MMWUC for June 9, 2008
- Dolores and the Blond
- Really, it's just a question of sanity.
- "Hot Fun in the Summertime" - Sly and the FS
- Waterworld Without Kevin Cosner
- Ice Cream Overload in Summer's Heat
- If at first you don't succeed, try again darn you
- MMWUC for June 2, 2008
- "Yesterday, all my troubles seemed so far away."
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May
(28)
- Shrubs, Closets, and Suspicions
- Just Watch Which Finger You Grow!
- Job or is it Job (the guy in the Bible)?
- Orifice Outrage
- MMWUC for May 26, 2008
- End Days
- Early Bird Class at WRW08
- NANOWRIMO, are you there?
- MIA I am or was or will be
- MMWUC for May 19, 2008
- Secret Weapons for WW2 - Blue Herons
- Burn baby, Burn!
- Off-beat and Unusual
- Screw the Volcano Jimmy Buffet
- Global Interest
- Scrub Those Queries
- "Bandits" by Elmore Leonard
- MMWUC for May 12, 2008
- Monsters in the Closet
- "Turtle Moon" by Alice Hoffman
- Fruitful Adventures
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June
(20)
Rick and Better-Half
Where I've Laid My Head
- Apex, NC (really Chatham County)
- Cary, NC
- Raleigh, NC
- Lafayette, CO
- Boulder, CO
- Westminster, CO (twice)
- Denver, CO
- Aurora, CO (twice)
- Mansfield, PA (Mansfield University)
- Berlin, Germany
- Ft. Devens, MA
- Ft. Dix, NJ (first of the all volunteer army)
- Ewing, NJ (Trenton State College)
- Middlesex, NJ (high school)
- Bridgewater, NJ
- Somerville, NJ (born)
Notes at the end of the world.
"There is nothing so much to be feared as fear itself." - Thoreau
"There is nothing to fear, but fear itself." - Roosevelt
"Be afraid. Be very afraid." - Wednesday Addams
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Create your own visitor map!
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Carrie is the person with whom I share my favorite meal - steak, mashed potatoes, and corn with sauteed onions & mushrooms followed by chocolate ice cream.
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This is the end of the blog. Go back to writing. Seriously! Edit that story.
2 comments:
LOL I love it. It's cuter than my guy walking into a bar thing.
http://geekyquill.blogspot.com/2009/02/homonym-walks-into-bar.html
I just love that joke.
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